Nutty, Behind the Screen Name!
by Totally Wicked
Summary: Sequel to Yogurt, Anyone! Have fun with Nutty's rant! One-shot! Flame me if you want! NOW EDITED! R/R!


Disclaimer: I don't own Inu Yasha and co., although I do own Nutty the squirrel! 

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Nutty, Behind the Screen Name

One-Shot: My Story… The TRUE Story

Author's Note:

Hey all! It's the insane authoress, TW! Yes, I'm back with another one-shot, a sequel to "Yogurt, Anyone?" **You must read "Yogurt Anyone?" or you won't get the point of this rant!** Okay, that's clear. Okay, this story is really just about our surgeon, Dr. Nutty, who has successfully neutered many horny man whores. I have taken the pain to translate Dr. Nutty's rant. Well, go enjoy! Review when you're done!

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(You're watching TV when the news comes on.)

"Hello! I'm Daisy McMoo and this is 'X-Cruciating News'! Tonight, we have a very important interview with Nutty, the Squirrel! You better believe it, folks! We have special information and we are sharing it! Here's Nutty! His interpreter will be Cowmor Bullings!" 

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Ahem. AHEM! Yes, I'm talking to you, bozo! Now listen to me!

Now, I'm sure you all know me as 'The stupid rodent who killed Miroku". Well, I'm not him! Do you know what pain that is, to be called a murderer? Well, it's painful! I'm am really a peaceful squirrel, living off nuts (all kinds!) and does a respectable job of being a doctor! 

Hey, I guess you must all know me from elsewhere! I mean, I was also the friendly little guy you threw that rock at the other day! Yeah, that was ME! I also ran around your yard the other day, climbing that tree and bugging your animals! 

Other than Miroku, I also neutered Sesshoumaru (his grew back, too bad!), Naraku, and a few others I will not name. I was a good doctor, using only natural ways to 'change' a man. 

Well, after this idiot author decided to make me famous, my downfall came quick! 

Waves and waves of never ending fan girls crowded over me, protesting the 'injustice' of what I did. Well, you know something? 

MIROKU HAD IT COMING!

HAHAHAHA! You heard me right! He asked for it! 

The whole entourage, the "Bear my child", it all mocked me! It was begging to be changed! 

YES! I mean it! I, Nutty the Squirrel, totally believe in what I did!

It was true! I did bite off his balls, and so what? 

You do it all the time to your male 'pets'! You take them to the doctor! So their balls can get cut off! 

Those stupid people… those stupid fans… they all mocked! They knew Miroku had it coming sooner or later! And you know what? 

HE DID!

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! 

And you know the 'injustice' of it? I was the one arrested! 

Taken to jail like a common criminal, trampled by mad protesters! It was humiliating! As if I was to be arrested for doing my job! I would rather be taken with dignity and honor! You know, one who actually killed someone. 

At court, I was treated as a murderer, yet I killed no one! It is all lies, I tell you! LIES! 

All I did was aim, jump, bite, chew, and brush! Just five things and I'm called a murderer! This is unfair! 

I want my lawyer! I want my justice! I want OUT!

Well, if that doesn't work… then one day… one day soon, I'll escape… I'll be back! And when I do, I'll have the skills a master of medicine would envy! 

And I'll make everyone's life a living nightmare! Yes, I will! 

Hahaha… HAHAHA! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Ahem. And don't worry! When I'm back, I'll be still as sane as I am at this very minute! 

Watch out, Miroku! I'll find you again…! 

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"Hello, this is, once again, Daisy McMoo. That was just our interview with convicted Dr. Nutty. Is it true that behind the cute mask is face of a horrible murderer? Is it fair that a squirrel, doing only his job, is put on neuter role? 

"Well, tune in next time of X-Cruciating News! We now return you to your original programming. Thank you for watching!"

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Wow. That was really short. Very, very short. Even for me. Wow. Anyway, tell me what you think! It made not have made sense, and frankly, I don't give a damn! So flame me! 

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Responses to Reviews:

Tatsu: Thanks for your review! I swear, if you were here, I would seriously stop writing! You're one of my only regular reviewers! It means so much to me, so thank you! Break out of jail? What breaking out of jail? ^.^! 

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Julia-Tears: Another on of my regular reviewers! Nope, I didn't get any rabid Miroku fans coming at me, so that's that! Yes, Fluffy's grew back. Definitely strange!

Ari Sky: Hi Kay-chan! I see you at school! 


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